Saturday, February 20

FSTI Practice [Post #5]

From chapter 2, page 23, exercise 1:

1. Revise each abstract "telling" that follows.

b. The party was awful.

Jake stumbled over his large feet as he made his way over to find some place he could hide. His head pounded, as if someone were ramming a hammer into his brain methodically. His heart thumped wildly; he was sure that someone would hear the constant allegro of his organ. He frowned to himself, trying to keep the room from spinning as the terrible tunes of old '80s rock blared from a set of broken stereos.

"Move it," he grumbled to a group of guests. He shoved them aside and ignore them as they cast disgusted looks at him.

c. She dresses funny.

At precisely 8'o clock on Monday mornings, Evelyn would walk into the cafe and ask for a cup of hot tea. She was a strange woman. She would enter with a style, a flourish that no one had. It was something of a dance, of a light tip toe as if she were afraid of the floor falling beneath her step. Her shoes would always be mismatched. Once she came in wearing a red heel and a green one on the other foot. Sometimes, it would go terribly wrong and she would come in hopping slightly because of the height difference. Other times, she would even mismatch her socks.

She sometimes wore a skirt--it would always be homemade, she proclaimed proudly. Sewn from dozens of different fabrics collected over the years. Other times, she wore a pair of brightly colored jeans or shorts. Despite the brightness, she managed to pull on a top that worked well with her style. Colorful beads, a top with a long neckline, dozens of bracelets--neither matching nor making sense--and she even wore a hat at times.

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